Grace, Leisure and Connection
by Julia Attaway
Last week we held a family day in honor of the Sacred Heart at the shrine where I work. At the end everyone headed outdoors for a cookout.
A tent was up on the lawn for a different event, and we ate our fresh-grilled hot dogs and hamburgers beneath it. Then, as if God wanted to emphasize how much He desires that we seek connection, He did something magnificent: He sent a rainstorm.
It was a tremendous, stupendous, and irresistible downpour. As the deluge began the children squealed and, almost as one, darted out onto the grass to dance in the rain. They ran in circles. They raced in and out of the tent, shouted to each other, held their mouths open to the sky to drink in the gift.
The parents were transfixed to see their children so full of joy. Moms began to talk to moms, and dads to dads. The rain created community in a way only God could have planned.
The Importance of Leisure
For the miracle of the rainfall to have borne fruit, the families had to have been there. Somewhere along the line each parent chose to invest their Friday night in an activity they believed could bring enjoyment, satisfaction, and meaning to their family.
There’s a word for using our free time in this way: leisure. The word is derived from the Latin licēre, which means license. God gives us license – permission, freedom – to rest in activities that bring us peace and joy.
Do we take advantage of leisure, or not? If we don’t, how can we do better? Here are three tips to help.
Evaluate Where Your Free Time Goes
Yes, you’re busy. Everyone is. But instead of focusing on not having enough time (we don’t really want a 30-hour day, do we?), let’s consider how to use the time we have better.
Here’s a thought: How much extra time would you have if there was a power grid failure for a week and you couldn’t watch movies, recharge your phone, or distract the kids with technology? What would you, what could you do with it? Go on a picnic? Tell stories by candlelight? Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge? Have a pancake-eating contest? Put on a play?
Spend some time, real time, imagining how you would cope. Then consider whether some of those activities might be worth spending time on now.
Make a List of the People and Activities that Bring You Joy
Leisure consists of doing the things that allow us to savor life. Often these have nothing to do with producing anything. Leisure consists of any activity we do for its own sake.
We take a leisurely walk in the park because we find joy in its beauty and contentment in seeing our children skip ahead and explore. We gather with friends because we relish conversation and connection. We visit an art museum to see the world through someone else’s eyes.
What counts as leisure differs for each person. Your challenge: for each member of your family (including yourself), make a list of one thing that brings the person joy, one thing that engages them wholeheartedly, and one thing that helps them be at peace.
Plan to incorporate some of these things each week in your family life. And when things get stressful, pull out your list and choose something new to do.
Pray
There are times when life is overwhelming and we can’t imagine leisure as a real possibility. But remember that prayer itself is a form of leisure. It restores meaning, helps us encounter mystery, and can bring our souls to peace. It engages our soul, heart, and mind. Best of all, it leads to connection with God himself, who had been known to rain down grace in abundance at the least expected time.
Julia Attaway is Executive Director of St. Frances Cabrini Shrine in New York City. She is a mother of five now-adult children. Her favorite leisure activities are long walks by water, working with children, and writing.
